12.23.2013

He is the Same

God is the same today as He was yesterday and will be tomorrow.

I wish I could ignore the headache, the cramping, the spotting.

He is the same.

But I can't.

He is the same.

If AF isn't here when I wake up tomorrow (Christmas Eve), she'll be here on Christmas morning.

He is the same.

I know I could have it worse, but this just sucks.

He is the same.

As if her arrival isn't enough, I'm having back cramps and leg pain - which I haven't had for a while.

He is the same.

Wonder if these are signs that the endometriosis is back?

He is the same.

I had a good cry on my drive home from work. I suspect it is just the start of the tears.

He is the same.

Tomorrow, The Man and I are hosting 15 people and then I am a reader at Midnight Mass.

He is the same.

On Sunday, we'll head to my Dad's for the day.

He is the same.

I just want to close myself in my bedroom with a case of wine.

He is the same.

Somehow, someway I will find hope and joy in Christmas.

He is the same.

17 comments:

  1. Friend. I am so sorry. He is with you and we are praying for you, but it still sucks.I am glad that it didn't play any games this month, but it still just sucks.

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  2. I'm soooooooo sorry. What a rough time for AF to show up, she always gets in the way. :-( Hope you and the man can get some quality time together this week.

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  3. So many prayers and much love. Wish I was closer so I could give you a big hug. <3

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  4. Sending you so much love right now.

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  5. Praying for you. I like your last line of somehow finding hope and joy. My one thought on hope is that this is the season of hope. I keep trying to mediate on that. ((((Hugs))))

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  6. Praying He carries you through this holiday season!

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  7. I am so sorry you are going through this :( I wish none of us were! I will pray for you that you may find comfort and peace my dear, (((hugs))).

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  8. Praying for you and for all of us who are feeling the pains of IF during this time and that endo is not coming back.

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  9. Hugs! I am glad to hear that AF didn't play any games with you this month, though a straightforward "NO" isn't necessarily that much better. I hope you find some time to be quiet, to try to find peace, and receive love and snuggles from your fur babies.

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  10. Oh R, I am so sorry. Prayers coming for you and The Man.

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  11. So so so sorry. Prayers you find some joy this Christmas. It is about Him.

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  12. I have been praying for you deeply over the last little while. My eyes welled up for you as I read this post. I can't wait to hug you soon.

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  13. Hugs... and definitely continued prayers, my sweet friend! I will especially pray for your joy.

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  14. Love, hugs and prayers for you. I am so sorry.

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