Not Normal

Exactly 2 months ago, I was told everything is normal by my regular Ob/Gyn Midwife (how I have a midwife without a pregnancy is another story). I was devastated and lifted back up all on the same day and started to feel like I was on the path to answers.

Six weeks ago, the first signs of hope in a while started to appear with the beginnings of an answer at my first NaPro appointment.

And yesterday, P., my Nurse Practitioner called and I got some more of the picture.

There is evidence of insulin resistance. (For those of you who like the numbers my insulin went from 5.2 before drinking the orange drink to 42.8 after drinking it.)

My progesterone is too low. The highest it ever reached was 12.8 (17.8 is the goal).

My pre-peak estrogen is good, really good actually, at 293 (250 is the goal).

My ultrasound was normal.

For anyone who might be going 'that's great, but what in the heck did you just say?': This means my body produces too much insulin and this extra insulin can cause cysts to form on my ovaries blocking ovulation and when there is ovulation, the cysts can block the corpus luteum from producing enough progesterone (doing it's job).

I have a mild case of PCOS (polycystic ovarian syndrome) with insulin resistance.

My thyroid is good and there is no evidence of diabetes.

There is a prescription for prometrium (to be taken P+3 through P+12 to increase my progesterone) and metformin (to keep my insulin lowers) waiting for me at the pharmacy.

Carbs and sugar are no longer my friend. *sniff* Chai from Starbucks I will miss you.

We are also awaiting the results of the se.men analysis. Please say a prayer that this goes well and the results are good. The Man is amazing and with every fiber of my being I want these results to come back better than normal. Let our problems be with me, not him.

I'm sort of stuck in the middle between being so grateful for some answers and wishing that everything were 'normal.' Between wanting to cheer with gratitude and wanting to burst into tears.

Oh and then there is the hope. The hope that maybe, just maybe, this journey is coming to an end. The hope that said immediately 'it's not P+3 yet this month you can start the prometrium right away.' The hope that was only tempered by the fears. The two sided fears of 'what if this doesn't work?' and 'what if this does work?' The hope that I will finally get to POAS and the fear of the of the result. The hope that the appointment with Dr. S for January will get to be cancelled. And the fear that it won't need to be cancelled. If I've ever needed God's Grace to handle this journey it is now.


  1. Wow. Rebecca, I know this is going to sound so weird. But I had bloodwork done after my second baby when my cycles were doing wonky things and guess what?

    I, too, have a very mild case of PCOS with some insulin resistance. Guess what else? I have progesterone deficiency. I, too, take Prometrium from P+3 to P+12 to ensure I have a long enough luteal phase. And when pregnant, I take progesterone through the first trimester because my body doesn't make enough.

    I hope sharing this brings you some peace. Because yes...you truly do have hope. :)

  2. Oh wow, wow, wow! Are we IF twins or what??? I saw your comment on my blog earlier, and yes, I spoke with P just a few days before you spoke with her over these results. First, I am thrilled you are getting answers. NaPro is great at helping those with PCOS. Second, as you know, I too have great estrogen and low progesterone!! My estrogen peaks in the 400's!!! But I don't have any signs of PCOS. I wonder what is causing my low progesterone. :( (Haven't even had time to ponder that!) Praying for you... so happy progress is being made.

  3. p.s. But I hear ya on the mixed emotions. ((hug))

  4. I've been there. There are few things in life more frustrating then knowing there's a problem but no one can tell you what or why. On one hand you don't exactly WANT there to be and underlying problem but if there is, you want to know so that it can be addressed. I hope that these test results open some doors for you.

    God is holding you in his hand, so hang in there!

  5. What strange creatures we women are. You are hoping beyond hope that the problems lie with you and not with the husband. Even in all the uncertainty and doubt and fear, you're still thinking of him and the effects it would have on him. Truly, we are creatures with knowledge and empathy for one another that knows no bounds. I love this fact about you. About us. It makes the world right when, in all that you face, you are still caring about another.

  6. Praying! I have been there so many times.

  7. Glad you are finding things out! I understand how it can be a relief, but sad all at the same time. The prometrium does wonders for me! I've been told there's good reasons for us PCOSers to have hope! Hang in there Rebecca, I'm right there with you!

  8. Glad the answers are starting to come, remember one day at a time. Prayers!

  9. I'm so happy to hear that you're getting some answers, but praying with you on the fears!

  10. Thank God for competent doctors, right? Yay for NaPro!!! This all sounds very promising. The Lord is at work!

  11. Ok so there is a problem, but there is an answer and hopefully after a few rounds of medicine there will be an end. I can't imagine how hard this journey is, but you have to be proud of yourself when you sit back and look at how you handle this journey. You followed your faith and your beliefs down the path you believe in. That's pretty awesome in and of itself!

  12. I went for my first "we haven't gotten pregnant in year, let's see a doctor" appointment last week, and my obgyn suspects PCOS. I won't know for sure until after my next appointment. It's a week after I'm supposed to ovulate, so she's going to do blood work and an ultrasound to make sure I'm ovulating.

    Praying for you!

  13. I'm so glad you're getting some answers. And, it sounds like there is hope. I'll be praying to St. Gerard for you & The Man!

  14. oh friend. I'm very sorry to hear that it's PCOS and IR. It's a tough road to travel, but I hope my story can encourage you. I have pretty severe PCOS, and was able to conceive after only a little over a year of trying. You will be in our prayers!