A Baby Giant works for the CIA

A few years ago I spent the whole weekend cleaning the house and ended up with a horrible case of back spasms.  To make it worse, on Monday morning I HAD to be at school because my class was going on a field trip and it's not a good idea for the Teacher to miss field trip day.  So, The Man agreed to come to drive me to work (it was a 90-minute one-way drive and driving while on muscle-relaxers is not a great idea) and just go on the field trip with us since he would be there.

He was about 4 weeks post-surgery (on his wrist), so not only was he not missing work, but he had a really great cast to show off to the kids.

On the bus ride there, he chatted with the kids and it turned out was a great help with taking the boys to the bathroom after the play we saw.

On the way back to school however, he engaged in a fun conversation with one of the little kiddos that went something like this:
Child:  I'm 3, how old are you?
The Man:  I'm a baby.
Child:  You're too big to be a baby.
The Man:  No, I'm not.  I'm a baby Giant.
Child:  No way!  You're not a baby giant, you're a grown up.
The Man:  No, really, I'm a baby Giant.
The child thinks about this for a second and then says:
Child:  No, you are definitely not a baby Giant, you are a grown up because Ms. Rebecca is a teacher and teachers have to be grown-ups and a grown-up wouldn't marry a baby, so you are not a baby Giant, you are a grown-up.
The Man:  Fair enough.  I'm a grown-up.

Throughout this whole conversation, I've been busting trying not to laugh.  I tell the child he is very right, I am a teacher; teachers are grown-ups; and I would never marry a baby.  I then turn and chat with another child while The Man and the first child continue talking.  I miss the rest of their conversation and the next morning at school this child's parent drops off and pulls me to the side, very seriously, and it goes something like this:

Parent (in a whisper):  Can I ask you a question?
Me:  Sure.
Parent (still whispering):  Does your husband work for the CIA?
Me:  Huh?
Parent (more whispering):  Does your husband work for the CIA?
Me:  No, my husband is a massage therapist.
Parent:  Really?
Me:  Yes, really.  Is there a reason you ask?
Parent:  Well, (child) came home yesterday and told me that your husband is a secret agent and that he was on a secret mission and was bit by a shark and that's why he had a cast on.
Me:  Huh?
Parent:  Yes, I figured the shark part was made up, but I thought the secret agent part might be real and I didn't want (child) spreading it if he was undercover.
Me (trying not to laugh hysterically):  No, my husband is definitely NOT a CIA agent.  He is however a big kid at heart and loves to play tricks and tell stories.  And a secret agent that got bit by a shark is definitely something I could hear him giving as a reason for his cast.
Parent:  So I guess I don't need to clarify that your husband is a grown-up and not a baby giant then, huh?
Me and Parent:  Hysterical laughter.

No, my husband is definitely not a baby Giant who works for the CIA, thanks for checking though!


  1. Oh my gosh! That is hilarious!

  2. That is so funny! I would have died laughing!

  3. hilarious! i can totally see that conversation happening. how funny the kid's parent talked to you later about it!!

  4. I love it! Very smart 3-year-old!

  5. I always think of Cliff when I see Jerry Seinfield.
    There's that twinkle in the eye.

  6. HOW FUNNY! Thanks for the laugh!

  7. That.is.hilarious!!!! I have a three year old, so it was funny to imagine!