A year ago today, I started this blog. I really didn't think I'd be sitting here a year later still writing. I thought it would be one of those things that I started, but never finished.
I've written about Faith, Friends, Family, Football; opened a few Cans of Worms; participated in Carnivals; and even given and received Awards.
When I read back through my posts, I see how I've changed. I see the highs and lows of this past year. But what I see most is how wrong I was.
I thought this blog would be a place for me to record the fun little things that happened in my life. It certainly has done that. But as I drove to the airport on Thanksgiving Day to pick up my brother and his fiance, missing Mass to do so, I felt God urge me to listen to the 'Inspirational' Genre on my iPod (if I couldn't worship at Mass, I could in the car).
The title of this blog comes from a song that is very special to The Man and I. I stand by it's title, with one addition. In everything I do I want to be sure The Man Feels My Love so that I may praise God, for without Him, I do not have The Man.
While there's been lots of fun stuff around here, the process of sharing my faith walk, my struggles, feeling the prayers of others and of praying for others has meant so much to me.
And it became clear to me that God had bigger plans for this blog in my life. It has become a chronicle of my walk in Faith. Of my increased knowledge and increased understanding of what it means to love and follow Him. Little did I know that this blog, and a simple Resolution to become more educated about my Faith, would have such a profound impact on my life.
Two-thousand nine has not been an easy year for us. I've struggled with my purpose in life; we've struggled financially; and at times, I thought I might just lose it. With each step forward, it seemed that we took ten steps back, and at times it became very hard to bear. It put stress on our marriage, and while I wouldn't say our marriage was ever in danger, it was more work than it was easy this year. It was the first year that I can say that.
But I've learned that God goes before me, always. That while He is omniscient, He also cares deeply. That the power of gratitude and prayer cannot be underestimated. That while I'm not comfortable quoting scripture, He is present in my life. Most importantly, I've learned that He has a place in my every day life and not just at Mass on Sundays - and how easy it is to have Him in my everyday life.
I'm definitely not claiming to have it all figured out or to be perfect. I still fail every day, the difference now is that I understand that God does not love me any less when I fail. I am absolutely Somewhere in the Middle (part of playlist above).
To those of you who've walked any part of this journey with me, you have touched my life. You've touched my life in a more profound way then I ever expected. Whether it's with consistent visits and comments or your own posts on your blogs, the impact has forever changed me. You were just what I was going to need this year, I didn't know it, but God did. From the bottom of my heart, I thank-you. If I could hug each and every one of you - I would, so consider yourself (((hugged))).
I had no idea what the first year would hold, but I am certainly looking forward to the 2nd...